KABOOM!
by Chuquita
Summary: Washu creates the ultimate nuclear explosive--in the form of a pie. When she must leave the lab for dinner, she decides the pie must be guarded by the most careful of people until she returns--unfortunately the only one around at the time is Mihoshi. When


4:48 PM 5/29/2002  
E-mail: lac31685@aol.com  
By: Chuquita  
Quote of the Week: "Adoodoodoo, adaadaadaa, is all I want to say to you; adoodoodoo adaadaadaa; their innocence will pull me  
through" -song  
  
Chuey's Corner:  
Chuquita: Hello and welcome to special edition of the Corner. Now you may ask; why is this particular fic so special?  
Vegeta: (flatly) Why is this particular fic so special, Chu?  
Chuquita: Because this is a Tenchi Muyo story! (grins) My second.  
Vegeta: (sighs) Hooray.  
Chuquita: You oh-kay Vedge? You seem a little more 'down' then usual.  
Vegeta: Kakarrotto's not here.  
Chuquita: I thought you were still mad at him for spooking you.  
Vegeta: I AM! It's just that it's hard to be mad at someone who's not here. It seems so much more gloomier without him.  
Chuquita: (looks around the room) [crickets chirping] ...I see what you mean.  
Vegeta: Where IS he anyway?  
Chuquita: He's busy.  
Vegeta: (cocks an eyebrow) Busy?  
Chuquita: Yeah, uh, busy doing, umm, stuff? (fake cheesy grin)  
Vegeta: [hears Piccolo laughing loudly offstage] (sweatdrops) This seems like an eerie premonition to me.  
Chuquita: Ahh, forget about it. (to audiance) I'd like to introduce our special guest and temporary co-co-host; Ayeka!  
Ayeka: [sits down next to Veggie & Chu] (to audiance) Why hello everybody.  
Chuquita: Sasami was our guest during the last Tenchi story, so I thought this time we'd have her sister with us instead.  
Ayeka: (smiles) A wise choice. It's a shame Tenchi couldn't be here with me.  
Chuquita: I'll try to get him next time; if there is a next time.  
Ayeka: (spots Veggie narrowing his eyes at her) And who is that?  
Chuquita: Oh, that's Veggie--  
Vegeta: (interupts) --the GREAT AND POWERFUL saiyajin no ouji of Bejito-Sei.  
Ayeka: (thinks) Bejito-Sei...oh yes, that planet BLEW UP, didn't it.  
Vegeta: (angry-boy) IT DID NOW BLOW UP IT WAS BLOWN UP---(pauses)---no, wait...  
Ayeka: (to Chu) You see, Lady Chuquita, Jurai has such advanced technology that we could easily withstand an attack on our  
planet.  
Vegeta: (snorts) Oh yeah, well MY subjects could EASILY defeat YOUR subjects! (sticks out his tongue) NEH!  
Ayeka: (curious-george) How many subjects do you HAVE, Prince Vegeta?  
Vegeta: ...1. (looks around; avoiding all eye contact) So, how many do you have?  
Ayeka: 9,000,221,587,634,2094,888.5½  
Chuquita: Wow, that's uh--that's a big number. Very large amount of people. (nods)  
Ayeka: One subject...that's awful sad.  
Vegeta: (smirks) It's not when your one subject's strong enough to take out half the galaxy at will!  
Ayeka: HA! He could not!  
Vegeta: Could too!  
Ayeka: Could not!  
Vegeta: Could too!  
Ayeka: Could not!  
Vegeta: (to Chu) She reminds me of certain black-hairred Onna I've come to hate and despise.  
Ayeka: If it's any condolence, YOU remind me of someone I know too.  
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) I knew I should have booked Ryo-oki instead. (turns to audiance) ANYWAYS! Today's fic is called  
"KABOOM!" It's a cross between a Spongebob Squarepants episode I saw and a Tenchi manga. Mihoshi accidentally eats a bomb and  
comedic madness insues. Have fun!  
  
Summary: Washu creates the ultimate nuclear explosive--in the form of a pie. When she must leave the lab for dinner, she  
decides the pie must be guarded by the most careful of people until she returns--unfortunately the only one around at the  
time is Mihoshi. When she returns to find the pie gone the only logical explaination is that it was eaten. And so Tenchi and  
the gang set out to stop Mihoshi before the pie explodes and takes them all down with her! Will they save her in time? Will  
the bomb go off? Will Kiyone have to get a new partner?!  
  
Vegeta: (to Aye) How much do you want to bet half the readers thought the Corner was the actual fanfic.  
Ayeka: Two dollars.  
Vegeta: You're on!  
*****************************************************************************************************************************  
  
" HAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHA! I'VE DONE IT! " Washu laughed, " I've created the most dangerous explosive ever--in  
pie form! " she held a large blueberry pie above her head, " When people search for weapons they look for things like guns  
or bombs; but no one would ever suspect something with such a simple outer coating as a pie could contain such ingredients  
powerful enough to anhilate the galaxy! " she grinned, leaning towards Ryo-oki, " You see, to the untrained eye this is  
merely just food. But you're only half-right. The crust is edible, but this pie is really filled with rare chemicals that  
when combined in a certain matter become terribly unstable. " Washu nodded, " Why, if even so much as a knife were to  
penetrate its core, well, it could probably blow up half the planet! "  
" Meow? " Ryo-oki gawked, then sniffed the pie inquizzitively.  
" Miss Washu! Dinner's ready! " Sasami said happily, sticking her head in the doorway.  
" COMING! " Washu waved to her. Ryo-oki was already halfway to the kitchen. Washu sweatdropped, then looked at her  
pie, " I can't just leave it here. " she looked around the room, " The lab's gotten filled up so quickly since I first moved  
in... " she sighed, " I'm going to have to have someone watch it. This person would have to be intellegent, cautious, and  
have a well-trained eye; but since I'll be busy eating dinner someone else will have to do it. " she scanned the lab, " Now  
let's see... " the room was empty except for one person who was sitting across the room waving at her, " ...no. I couldn't.  
There's no way---ohhh. " she groaned, " Mihoshi, will you come here a minute. "  
" Sure! " Mihoshi said happily, accidentally knocking over several beakers on her way to the table, " Oh, I--I'm so  
sorry, I just can't get used to this lab you know it's so crowded and-- "  
" --Mihoshi can you watch this pie while I go eat dinner? " Washu said flatly.  
" Hai! I had mine earlier today you see because in about an hour Kiyone and I have to go on patrol duty so-- "  
" --LISTEN! " Washu interupted her, " Mihoshi this is a very important pie you're dealing with. I don't want you to  
touch it or eat it or do anything to it! Just let it sit there. If it were to be moved even the slightest inch something  
TERRIBLE could happen, get it? "  
" Don't worry! First class detective Mihoshi is on the job! " Mihoshi raised her arm to salute Washu, knocking the  
pie off the table. Washu dove and caught the pie just before it hit the floor. She sighed with relief.  
She sweatdropped, " Something tells me this is not a very good idea. "  
  
  
" Ahh! That was good fish, Sasami! " Ryoko grinned, patting her stomach.  
" Thank you! " Sasami said, cleaing the dishes.  
" Unlike your bratty sister who can't cook squat! " she snickered.  
" OOH WHAT DID YOU SAY! " Ayeka lept to her feet, glaring at Ryoko.  
" Nothing--just that you can't cook to save your life! " Ryoko said, " Tenchi would NEVER go out with a girl who  
would STARVE him to death on overcooked noodles and canned peas. "  
" HOW DARE YOU INSULT ME LIKE THAT, YOU! " Ayeka snorted, " At least I know HOW to cook. You lazy space-pirate. "  
" LAZY! "  
" That's right. The only food YOU could bring Tenchi would be STOLEN from a supermarket. " she folded her arms.  
" OH! YOU'RE CALLING ME A SHOPLIFTER NOW! " Ryoko yelled at her.  
" Girls! Girls! Calm down! " Tenchi laughed nervously. The two glared at each other for a moment, then returned to  
their spots at the table.  
" Yes Tenchi. " they said in unison, which only caused them to turn their attention back to one another and glare  
some more. After about five minutes Ayeka finally got up.  
" I'm going to help Sasami put the dishes away. " she announced to nobody.  
" I'm going up to my room. " Ryoko said, bored, then smiled at Tenchi, " You can come too if you want Tenchi... "  
" DON'T YOU DARE! " Ayeka screamed from the kitchen.  
" Honestly, " Washu rolled her eyes, sitting in the living room and watching TV, earplugs in her ears to silence  
the arguement, " Like children. " she froze, " Speaking of children, " she said, getting up, " I better go check on how  
Mihoshi's do--OOF! " the door to Washu's lab flung open, smushing her against the wall.  
" Hi everybody how was dinner? " Mihoshi smiled.  
" Oh, it was great. " Tenchi commented.  
" Well, I've got to be going now. " she said, adjusting her policewoman's hat. She patted her stomach, " Boy that  
was a good pie, Sasami. "  
" Ohhhh....ohhhhh.. " a voice groaned from behind the door. Mihoshi closed it to reveal Washu flattened against the  
outside of the door.  
" Washu, how did you get there? You know you really shouldn't stand infront of doors like that, it's dangerous. "  
Mihoshi blinked.  
" I can think of something else that's dangerous. " Washu grumbled, peeling herself off the door. She rubbed her  
face in pain, then proceeded down the stairs. Tenchi, Mihoshi, and Sasami watched her leave, then suddenly sweatdropped a  
second later when a scream of horror ran throughout the house. Washu came bounding back up the stairs.  
" THE PIE! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH THE PIE! " she grabbed Mihoshi by the collar and swung her back and forth.  
" Puh--puh--pie? " Mihoshi said, a little dazed from behind shook so hard.  
" YES THE PIE YOU AIRHEAD! THE PIE I GAVE YOU TO GUARD! "  
" Oh--the pie. I ate it. " Mihoshi smiled at her. Washu's face turned a pale green.  
" You ate it? "  
" Yup! "  
" You're kidding. "  
" Uh, no, sorry, I'm not. "  
::Impossible! How could she have even gotten it in her mouth without it exploding!:: Washu thought, ::Unless she  
somehow managed to eat it whole...and if she ate it whole; that means the chemical reaction hasn't gone on yet--and by the  
time it reaches her lower instestines--:: " AHHH! " Washu screamed, letting go of Mihoshi and backing up, " Mihoshi! That  
pie--how could you EAT IT! "  
" Well, I was hungry, and it was sitting right there so, I ate it! " she shrugged. Washu slapped herself on the  
forehead.  
" MIHOSHI THAT PIE CONTAINS A POWERFUL EXPLOSIVE! ONE FALSE MOVE AND YOU'LL EXPLODE FROM THE INSIDE OUT! " Washu  
screamed.  
" EEK! " Mihoshi shrieked, " Oh no! What'll I do! What'll I do! " she began to shake.  
" No Mihoshi don't shake! " Tenchi pleaded nervously, " It'll only make the bomb more likely to go off! "  
" AHHHHH!!! "  
" Washu, what'll we do! " Sasami said, worried.  
" We have to find a way to keep her from digesting that bomb! " Washu said, then explained, " You see, it causes a  
threat to us already, but by the time she digests it the chemicals will be flooded throughout her bloodstream. We need to get  
the pie out somehow; or disable the bomb's chemical reaction before it leaves her stomach. "  
" How much time does that give us? " Tenchi asked.  
Washu looked at her watch, " Appoximately...34 minutes. "  
" GAH! " Tenchi and Sasami fell to the ground animé style.  
" 34 MINUTES! " Tenchi cried, getting back up, " THAT'S NOT ENOUGH TIME WASHU! "  
" Can't we do something! " Sasami gawked.  
" I'm afraid not. I could go down to the lab and find an acid strong enough to counteract it, but that takes time.  
You two would need to stay here and watch her while I do so. "  
" Of course we will little Washu. " Tenchi said, conserned. Washu bolted back down the stairs. Tenchi and Sasami  
left in the living room with a very unstable police officer.  
" Oh Tenchi! I don't want to explode! " Mihoshi cried. Sasami patted her on the back.  
" Don't worry Mihoshi, it'll be alright. Washu's going for help right now. " Sasami said, reassuring her.  
" Mihoshi! Time to go! " Kiyone poked her head in the front door, then yelped as she felt something grab her by the  
ankles.  
" WAHHHHHHHHHHHH! I DON'T WANNA "GO" KIYONEEEEEE!!! " Mihoshi wailed. Kiyone looked down at her partner, who was  
hugging her ankles on the floor.  
" What's her problem? " she asked Tenchi.  
" Well--uh--you see the thing is, Kiyone, Mihoshi ate a bomb Washu made-- "  
" --and now she's going to EXPLODE! " Sasami finished, " ANY MINUTE NOW! "  
" Explode? " Kiyone grinned widely, then froze, " THEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE NEXT TO ME! " she yelled at  
Mihoshi angrily, " I DON'T WANT TO DIE TOO!! " she pulled herself out of Mihoshi's grasp.  
Mihoshi sat up, rubbing her eyes, " I'm sorry, it's just that *hic*! "  
Tenchi, Sasami, and Kiyone instantly froze in place.  
" Mihoshi, PLEASE tell me you didn't just hiccup? " Kiyone gulped, sweat dripping down her forehead.  
" I didn't mean to, I always, *hic*; hiccup when I'm *hic*; nervous. " Mihoshi explained.  
" If her hiccuping disturbs that bomb we're all goners! " Tenchi said nervously. Sasami hid behind him.  
" WHY DID YOU EVEN EAT A BOMB IN THE FIRST PLACE! " Kiyone scholded her.  
" Actually it was a pie... " Mihoshi trailed off.  
" A _PIE_?! "  
" Yes, " Tenchi turned towards Kiyone, " The bomb was shaped like a pie. "  
Kiyone sweatdropped, " Oh boy... "  
" I'M BAAAAAAACK! " Washu announced, loudly re-entering the room. Everyone jumped in surprise.  
" WASHU DON'T DO THAT! " Tenchi said in a loud whisper.  
Washu stared at the quartet. All four of them were frozen in various positions, " What are you doing? "  
" Ugh, we're trying not to move so Mihoshi doesn't blow up. " Kiyone groaned.  
" ...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! " Washu laughed. The others sweatdropped.  
" Hey, what's so funny? " Kiyone cocked an eyebrow.  
" Yeah Washu, what's going on! " Tenchi demanded.  
Sasami gasped, " I KNOW! You found an antidote didn't you! " she said happily.  
" That's right! " Washu gave her a thumbs-up sign.  
" And so fast too. " Tenchi commented, amazed.  
" Well nothing's impossible for the greatest genius in the universe! " Washu grinned proudly.  
" Yes Washu, you are a genius! " Washu's A puppet said, on her left shoulder.  
" Hooray for Washu! The greatest genius the world as ever known! " B added.  
" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA--they're right! " Washu chuckled.  
" Well, she's not much one for subtlety, is she? " Kiyone said dryly.  
" No, she's not. " Tenchi sighed.  
" Oh-kay Mihoshi, all you have to do is drink this liquid and you'll be back to normal in no-time! " Washu said,  
approaching Mihoshi with the beaker of antidote held out.  
" Thanks, you don't know how much I appreciate this. " Mihoshi said, reaching out grab it. She stopped when she began  
to hear a loud gurgling noise in her stomach, " What the??? "  
" OH NO! IT'S TOO LATE! SHE'S GONNA BLOW!! " Washu screamed.  
" WHAT'LL WE DO! WHERE DO WE GO! " Kiyone panicked.  
" There's no where TO go! " Washu replied.  
" Ehhh... " Kiyone's face turned a pale white.  
" *RUMBLE**RUMBLE**RUMBLE**RUMBLE**RUMBLE**RUMBLE*-- " the noise in Mihoshi's stomach grew louder until, " --*FFT!* "  
" ... "  
" ... "  
" ... "  
" *sniff* *sniff*. What's that smell? " Sasami said, sniffing the air.  
" Heh-heh, whoops, that's me. " Mihoshi laughed nervously.  
" GAS?! THAT'S ALL THAT WAS?! " Kiyone gawked, then turned to Washu, " YOU SAID SHE WAS GONNA BLOW UP!!! "  
" I don't get it. " Washu blinked, confused, " She was supposed to explode in a loud KABOOM. The chemicals in the pie  
were mixed perfectly. I don't get what I missed. The nitric acid, the plutonium, the blueberry-- "  
" --blueberry? " Mihoshi said, baffled.  
" Yeah, blueberry, you know, the flavor of the pie! " Washu said, annoyied.  
" Oh, I didn't eat a BLUEberry pie. " Mihoshi corrected her.  
" WHAT!? "  
" I ate an apple one. " she pointed out, " It was the leftovers from what Sasami made yesterday. Besides, I'm  
allergic to blueberries, you know THAT. "  
Tenchi spoke up, calmly, " Well, that's all well and good Mihoshi but-- "  
" --THEN WHERE'S THE STINKING PIE!!! " Washu screamed at the top of her lungs.  
" Huh? " Mihoshi blinked.  
Washu tried to calm down, " The blueberry pie that I left with you earlier, Mihoshi. WHERE did you put THAT pie! "  
" ...OH! _THAT_ pie! " she clasped her hands together, " I didn't have time to watch it so I brought it up the  
hill to Katsuhito's! "  
" Grampa?! " Tenchi gulped along with the others, sans Mihoshi.  
" *KABOOM*!!! "  
" TENCHI!!! " Katsuhito's angry voice roared down upon them. The group sweatdropped to see him standing in the  
doorway, covered in soot.  
" So--is THAT the big "kaboom" you were talking about? " Kiyone murmured to Washu.  
" Yup--heh-heh--that's the "kaboom" alright. " the scientist put her hand behind her head.  
" I suggest we get going now. " Kiyone nodded to a nervous Mihoshi, who quickly followed her out the backway.  
" I'd love to stay and chat with you three, but I have something I need to get back to--NOW. " Washu said, equally  
nervous. She dashed back down to the lab.  
" I have go clean the oven out, bye Tenchi! " Sasami said. The last of the crew abandoning him into another room.  
Tenchi turned to the deep-gray, soot-covered man in the door. He chuckled lightly, " Well, you see Grampa, it all  
started out like this, Washu made this PIE you see... "  
*****************************************************************************************************************************  
4:04 PM 5/30/2002  
THE END!  
Chuquita: TA-DA! Another 1-day wonder!  
Vegeta: This took you TWO days.  
Chuquita: Don't interupt me! I'm busy!  
Ayeka: Well, I must say I certainly had an 'interesting' time here today with you too.  
Vegeta: (rolls his eyes) You think this is interesting you should see some the weird stuff that happens here on REGULAR days.  
[turns to Chu] Speaking of regulars, can I anticipate a return of you-know-who next time.  
Chuquita: Son? Yup, he's coming back. You know I didn't think this "vacation" of mine would take so little time. I HAD to  
get this story out on notepad though.  
Vegeta: Good for you.  
Chuquita: (glares at him) You just wait until the next Corner. Some "bad" things are instore for "little Veggie"  
Piccolo: [walks by; laughing loudly]  
Vegeta: (glares at Pic; then turns back to Chu) You've got a doozy planned don't you?  
Chuquita: Yes I do!  
Ayeka: I suppose this is goodbye for me then.  
Chuquita: Yeah, I guess it is.  
Ayeka: I'll send you the good news after Tenchi and I are engaged.  
Vegeta: (laughs) Like that'd happen.  
Chuquita: (whispers to Vedge) I'm more of a Tenchi/Ryoko fan myself.  
Vegeta: (snickers)  
Ayeka: (rage) WHAT WAS THAT?!  
Chuquita: (nervous laugh) Heh-heh-heh. NOTHING! Nothing at all.  
Ayeka: (normal again) (smiles) Good. Farewell Lady Chuquita, (glares at Veggie) OUJI. [leaves]  
Chuquita: Well Veggie, it looks like you've made another "friend".  
Vegeta: (sarcasm) Yes, lucky me.  
Chuquita: (to audiance) Goodbye everybody!  
Vegeta: (small wave) Whenever. 


End file.
